In
continuation to our sessions on Self Leadership, today we delved deeper to
understand Emotional Intelligence, its importance and relevance. Gliding
through the subject we also covered aspects of being Happy and we finally ended
becoming a stronger community.
A
beautiful incident occurred to me during the man’s session, the man who speaks
gold. January 2009 will always be close to my heart and special because of one
simple reason, I met someone who changed me in more than one way. 22nd
January, 2 days before my birthday, I was sitting at Brittos, Baga Beach, in
Goa. The sunny morning, golden beach and the water whistling by my ears made me
feel, aah! Heaven. It had been a long night and my friends were fast asleep
after the nocturnal adventures Goa offers. I however did not want to miss the
sunrise and hence woke up quite early and after a nice walk by the beach,
picked a spot at my favorite shack across the beach enjoying Shrimp Cocktail, a
specialty that had been famous at Brittos since time immemorial.
It
had been over a month that I had been extremely stressed at work and was not
able to come to terms with why things were falling apart. This very thought
kept pondering in my head at all times. In fact my trip to Goa was only a means
to de-stress but somehow the thoughts just wouldn’t allow me peace. Across the
table a gentleman probably a little better built than myself and a few years
elder to me had been observing me and the Shrimp Cocktail, when he finally
couldn’t stop himself and came to sit beside me. He said his name was Anand and
he belonged to Pune, surprisingly I had lived in Pune for over 10 years myself
and hence I felt a connection immediately with the man. He said, “Why are you
not enjoying your Shrimp Cocktail?” Are you bothered by something? Obvious as
it would seem I said no, after all, why would I want to share my miseries with
Anand? Anand somehow realized I was bothered but reluctant to tell him, so he
started telling me about himself. A Computer Science engineer by education, he
had been working with Symantec for over 8 years and had managed to become a
Project Manager. Within a few minutes in the conversation, I realized I had
blurted out my entire life to him. An hour ago he was a stranger but now he
knew everything about me which included certain aspects which even my closest
friends weren’t aware of. I had the same usual problems, too much of work, too
little time for myself, even lesser for friends and family, I wasn’t able to
find meaning in life.
After
hearing me for a while most people tend to start consoling me because I am
quite good at lamenting but to my surprise Anand said, “Do you feel like crying
or shouting or kicking?” Amazed I said that’s exactly what I feel like doing.
He didn’t start pouring gyaan; he
said often in life we feel so because we are not clear in our heads about what
we really want. He narrated how after completing his engineering he did not
know why he did engineering, he did not know why he joined Symantec and he did
not know what he wanted to do ahead in life. With such emotions, like mine, he
too travelled to various parts of the Konkan Coast to find answers to find
solutions but met only failure. Post returning from one of his adventures one
morning he was informed at work that on Sunday as part of a Corporate Social
Responsibility activity they would be taken to an orphanage to interact with
children and spend time with them. He emphasized that this was his turning
point in life. He met a kid named Akarsh there and Akarsh changed his life. A
boy of just 9 years wanted so much out of life. Akarsh wanted the stars at his
feet and was dead adamant of making it happen. That’s when Anand realized if a
9 year old boy, far underprivileged than himself could have such dreams, why
couldn’t he?
Anand
said that for the last 7 years since meeting Akarsh, he had only strived to get
everything possible but not just for himself but for Akarsh and kids like
Akarsh. Anand today spends every Sunday at different Orphanages interacting
with kids like Akarsh, encouraging them to dream big and helps such initiatives
with not only money but his heart and time. He was not only inspired but
inspiring others as well. Although he had grown by 7 years, his heart was stuck
at the point he met Akarsh. As if he wanted to walk the mile with him. See him
achieve see him smile.
I
at once understood the meaning of Anand’s story. I understood the meaning of my
story. I understood what we all finally want, what we all finally crave for.
Although
Anand’s story ends here, the question that lurks in my mind are, how
Emotionally Intelligent Anand was. How he knew himself (SELF AWARENESS) at the
bottom of his heart. How this enabled him to listen to and understand others
better and how it made it so easy for him to relate to others and build trust.
Within an hour he made me feel I could tell him much more than I had ever told
my best friend.
He
also taught me in many ways the aspects and principles of joy, he exemplified
honoring himself and his gifts, he found the cause in life that gave him joy,
he was utilizing his gifts and uniqueness to work and live for that cause, he
was sharing the happiness with everyone and in doing so he was also enabling me
to do the same.
Anand
and I just had an hour and a half to know each other. In this time we had our
time of conflict as well, when I wasn’t open to listen to him and he also am
sure must have felt some awkwardness. Even when we started interacting, I
listened to him with an artificial mindset, a mindset that would hear what he
said from one ear and lose it through the other. But in the end it was genuine.
I had not only understood the strength of CAUSE but we had also become a
stronger community.
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