ShikhaBhatia_BLP059_Happiness_September2012

Happiness- What is happiness? A very simple question yet very difficult to answer. Happiness is different for different people.  Ideally it is defined as a state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. (Source: Wikipedia)

Happiness is something that everyone wants to have and even if you have billions in your bank account, if you are not happy your life will be meaningless. I have learnt over a period of time that money really can’t buy happiness. There are so many people who have all the luxuries in life still they are not happy and not satisfied with what they have. It clearly shows that happiness lies above all these materialistic things and there is a need to understand what exactly happiness is.

Happiness is most of the time confused with worldly pleasures but we forget that pleasure doesn't last for long so it’s a very temporary way of getting happiness. Researchers have distinguished happiness in two categories:

Temporary happiness – it is something you experience when you achieve some targets that you have set for you in your life. For example when you get good grades or promotion you feel happy but that doesn’t last for long and after some time you again start searching for things or targets that will make you happy.

Permanent happiness - it is something that is not achieved but experienced over a period of time. When you can be happy even in worst conditions or when certain things change your perspective to look at things positively, then comes the state where you learn how to be happy in all circumstances and that is ever lasting happiness.

We generally run after temporary happiness and never try to achieve permanent happiness. This has been the history and is still continuing. But it is indeed very important to work towards attaining permanent happiness.

I have seen so many times that people wait to be happy; there happiness depends on the things and circumstances. “When I will get a good job in a multinational company then I will be happy.”  We could be happy even without attaining these things as real happiness lies all above these and we don’t have to wait for all these things to happen to be happy.

Psychologists also believe that happiness can be defined and it is very important to do so as well. Over the course of time we can learn to be happy by understanding the positives in a human being. Positive Psychology is a branch of psychology that tells us about the “strengths and virtues of an individual that enable individuals to thrive”. Psychologists study strengths, positive emotions, resilience and happiness and their studies reflects that by studying positives, new ways to achieve permanent happiness can be learnt.

Martin Seligman, one of the leading researchers in positive psychology and author of ‘Authentic Happiness’, describes happiness as having three parts: pleasant life, good life and meaningful life.

1.)  Pleasant Life: It is the “feel good” part of happiness. It is about having as many pleasures as possible in life. In my views pleasure doesn’t equal happiness. It is just a temporary way of feeling happy.

2.)  Good Life:  It consists of the roots that lead to flow. It consists of knowing what your passions and strengths are and then working towards those to achieve happiness.

3.)  Meaningful Life: It is about using your strengths in the service of something that is bigger than you are.

Anil Sir also discussed reasons that cause unhappiness. He gave 3 reasons:

1.)  Unstated emotional expectations of those whom I care about which are not being met.

2.)  Regrets about the past.

3.)  Guilt that I carry with me.

I came across one more term related to happiness i.e. ‘Synthetic Happiness’. Dan Gilbert, author of “Stumbling on Happiness”, in his talk on Ted talk talked about how we can create our own happiness and how it is like a mental immune system. He explains beautifully what synthetic happiness is and how it can be achieved. We can create our own happiness and it’s not always you will get what will make you happy. You can be just as happy if you don’t get what you want, as you can if you get what you want. This is known as synthetic happiness.

After looking at happiness through various angles, I would like to conclude with a thought that “Happiness is not something you find outside of yourself, but within.”  It can only be achieved through inner peace and has to be everlasting.

So stay happy!! Feel Happy!! J